Too Up To Go Down–Rainbows at the end of the day

I am too full of today’s experiences to go to bed just yet even though I know I should sleep soon. We just had our first day hearing the stories of family members of someone who took his own life. Hearing how his mother coped and carried on with and for her family was a powerful experience. I could feel a lot of what she felt and yet I know that I cannot truly grasp the depth and complexity of her pain. It was humbling and, for me, a spiritual connection that tapped into my own experiences of loss. It was said today during the training that a problem shared is a problem halved but I don’t think we took on her pain so much as held it with her and were honored to witness some of its transformation into a source of meaning. This experience and the conversations I had during the training have helped confirm for me that post-traumatic growth is something I need to explore more. It occurs to me that the rainbow was a symbol for this family’s narrative of loss and is an apt metaphor for turning something horendous into something hopeful.